She laughed her way into our hearts during the auditions.
Her aura is so transcending, she infected not one, but two groups of singers during Hollywood Week’s Group Night.
She has been selfless, tearfully thanking all the little people who have had a hand in her success.
Clearly, Brent Keith isn’t quite sure what to make of her. (See video evidence below.)
She was Tatiana Nicole back when she was performing in clubs like Whiskey a Go Go out in California.
She has been Tatiana Del Toro on season eight of American Idol.
And she has been beloved by one and all.
OK, not really.
But she is loved by the folks at VoteForTheWorst.com. They were in a somber mood Thursday because their princess failed to advance to the final 12 on Wednesday night’s results show. Now they’re hoping she somehow makes it into the wild card show that represents the last chance for 2009’s aspiring Idols.
Earlier this week, a banner on their Web site encouraged folks to vote for the dark-haired drama queen. ”No matter what Tatiana does, we’ll love her,” the banner screamed. “She is absolute perfection.”
Well, let’s just say perfection is in the eye of the beholder.
Let’s just say I’m hoping Wednesday night is the last time we get to see Tatiana’s brand of perfection on the Idol stage.
But give Tatiana this, she sure inspired the folks posting comments on four Idol message boards I monitor, including VoteForTheWorst.
So, I’ve prepared my own tribute to Tatiana. My favorite Tatiana comments from those forums. The links take you to the message boards, should you care to wallow there.
* “If Tatiana Del Toro makes it to the top 12, I will never watch Idol ever again. EVER. EVER. EVER. I’d rather listen to a Toro lawnmower.” Link
* “As long as she doesn’t laugh again. She scared the crap out of my cat!” Link
* “I bet my son a candy bar that Tatiana would get ousted tonight. I guess I’d better get the kind I like — I’ll be sharing it in my ultimate despair that she made it through. That woman is Annoying with a capital Pathetic. And you know it’s bad when Simon asks you to “try not to be so annoying.” Link
* “I look forward to the demise of Hyena girl for two reasons. First is to witness her hysterics, and second is to never, never hear that laugh again!”
* “…if i had chop talent I’d do a Tatiana throughout history pictorial. Custer at Little Big Horn ? Surely Tatiana was somewhere among the cavalry. Hiroshima? You know Tatiana was workin the rice paddy that August afternoon. The tsunami in Indonesia? I’m betting Tatiana was playing in the water somewhere that day. The wake of destruction she will bring to anything she’s doing is epic!” Link
* “I swear, if I hear that nails on the chalkboard voice again i’m gonna blast her with my illudium q-36 explosive space modulator……….and i mean it.” Responded a fellow poster: “yea get that illudium q-36 explosive space modulator and get her!!” Link
* “Tatiana is not a train wreck. No, no. She is four trains meeting at cross tracks at the same time two A340-700’s are falling from the sky, with a Blackjack bomber dropping Little Boy and Fat Man at the same time….and they ALL meet in the exact same spot!” Link
And I can now include this one because it looks so unlikely. Earlier this week, the thought made me shudder …
* “I can only imagine what she’d be like if she actually wins. There would be a cosmic explosion of crazy.” Link
All that said, I felt a twinge of sympathy for Tatiana Wednesday night. Maybe some of those forum posters felt the same way.
I mean, this week on Idol, you could tell Tatiana had read her reviews. She tried to contain that laugh. She tried to hold in the outbursts. She preened for the camera plenty. But she didn’t shriek. Not once.
The judges tried to prod her into action after her performance Tuesday night. Ryan Seacrest shamelessly tried again last night, just before the final results were announced. Who knows? Lots of her previous craziness might have been Idol provoked.
And, yeah, Tatiana broke down in tears after discovering she was not headed to the finals, but she kept it together pretty well considering the total meltdown most expected.
Keep this in mind, Tatiana.
Control the histrionics, and you’re not a bad singer.
Let the histrionics run wild, and you could have a long future on reality TV shows.
Please, just not on American Idol.
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