Idol Chatter & Voice Views

That’s just great.

I thought maybe Steven Tyler would watch his judging colleagues and decide to judge someone one of these days.

Instead, Jennifer Lopez and Randy Jackson decided to mimic the resident rock star on rock and roll night and praise every single performance.

The closest the judges came to criticism Wednesday night — Randy Jackson wasn’t thrilled with Stefano Langone’s opening on “When a Man Loves a Woman.” But, in Randy’s opinion, Stefano brought it home at the end. So it’s all good, Dawg.

All good unless you like judges who judge. In which case, you’d apparently better find another show to watch. Perhaps the X Factor this fall.

Look, as a group, the Idols were good last night. Some of them, though, were far from great.

And, for those counting along, that’s at least 31 straight performances Steven Tyler has loved. Not a negative comment for three straight weeks.

Here’s the recap:

Best of the Night: Haley Reinhart was the next logical gal to head home on Cute Guy Idol. I write “was” because there’s no way she deserves to go home after that performance of Janis Joplin’s “Piece of My Heart.” Haley paired her always fun on-stage persona with a great vocal to turn in one of the best performances of Season 10. Way to slay it, Haley! I’ll be rooting for you tomorrow night.

Runners-up: Pia Toscano might just have the best voice on Season 10. She sure dispelled any notion that she can’t sing up-tempo songs Wednesday, performing “River Deep, Mountain High.” But Pia still needs to cut loose on stage, Tina Turner style. Or at least Haley Reinhart style. Because the best singer isn’t the best performer on Idol.  Heck, she didn’t even let her hair down for that performance.

And if Pia doesn’t have the most pleasant voice on Idol this season, that distinction goes to Scotty McCreery. Now tell me: Is anyone — absolutely anyone — surprised he picked an Elvis song on rock week. I’m just surprised he picked that Elvis song. There are lots better. Still, Scotty looked as at home on stage as I wish Pia did. And sounded great again. He’s Mr. Steady on a year of up-and-down performances from the Idol guys.

Deserves to go home: This will surprise you — Casey Abrams. I felt sure Casey would regain his growl and his edge on rock night. He didn’t. Instead, we got a lame, off-key version of “Have You Ever Heard the Rain.” Jennifer wants to sit in the front row to watch Casey. Hmm. If I paid good money for a ticket to watch that performance, the only reason I’d want to be in the front row would be to throw a rotten tomato in Casey’s direction. It was that bad compared to his performances earlier this season. And I don’t care if he had played the standup bass upside down. It would not have salvaged it.

Please keep him: I doubt he’s in danger anyway, but I was not nearly as impressed by the judges with James Durbin’s decision to slow things down on rock week. James, this was your night to outshine everyone. There will surely be themes down the road where you could slow things down. Tonight was not that night. And it still might have worked with a magical vocal on “While My Guitar Gently Weeps.” That vocal, however, was far from magical.

Advice of the night: Goes to Stefano Langone, who trotted out his third straight ballad on rock night, singing one of the most ill-fitting rock night songs ever — “When a Man Loved a Woman” by that acclaimed rock and roll legend, Michael Bolton. Huh?  Look, Stefano, get over yourself. Go back to singing pop songs, and you might survive. Ballads are not your niche, regardless of what Jennifer Lopez says.

Baffled by Idol: What was will.i.am, king of autotone, doing as a mentor on rock and roll night? And weren’t we promised no guest mentors this week?

Baffled by Idol: Finally, Idol made Jacob Lusk perform first. But why did he get the honor of starting off his song, “Man in the Mirror,” as a duet with the woman who wrote it? How fair is that?

Baffled by Idol: So this was also supposed to be the year contestants were forced to get out from behind their instruments. Yet there was Paul McDonald, performing with his trusty guitar for a third straight week. Hey, I never thought the original edict made any sense. But if there’s going to be an edict, who decides how often contestants can use an instrument and when?

There were a lot of other baffling moments on Idol tonight, but I’ll hold some of them for tomorrow’s results blog. Meanwhile …

Prediction for Thursday: Based on last night’s performances, I’d put Casey Abrams, Paul McDonald and Stefano Langone in the bottom three. But I have a feeling  Stefano will be joined in the bottom three by a combination of Haley Reinhart, Lauren Alaina or Jacob Lusk instead.

Song by song grades (blog here):

Haley Reinhart: Piece of My Heart, A
Pia Toscano: River Deep, Mountain High, B+
Scotty McCreery: That’s Alright, B+
Jacob Lusk: Man in the Mirror, B
Lauren Alaina: Natural Woman, B-
James Durbin: While My Guitar Gently Weeps, C
Paul McDonald: Folsom Prison Blues, C
Stefano Langone: When a Man Loves a Woman, C
Casey Abrams: Have You Ever Heard the Rain, C-