The Four returns for a second season Thursday night on FOX.
Season 2’s original four will include Sharaya J., James Graham, Carvena Jones and Stephanie Zelaya.
That means a female hip-hop artists, a pop hunk imported from across the ocean, a soulful singer and a pop cutie.
If the makeup sounds familiar … well, yep, it’s just about identical to the original four from Season 1.
The Four introduced Season 2’s The Four in the video below, complete with guest appearances from the show’s cast.
Via holograms, of course.
And offering astute words of wisdom like: “I need to see something, hear something, feel something I’ve never felt in my life … It’s gonna get crazy.”
On that note, I offer up my six most pressing questions about The Four Season 2.
1. Will any of the original four survive the second episode? Sean “Diddy” Combs assured us the original four from Season 1 were selected for their greatness. Within two shows, they were all gone. They successfully defended one of five challenges. That’s greatness?
2. Will Fergie get dizzy and collapse on stage? I mean, when a singer performs for a possible challenge, and those circles start lighting up around her feet, she spins and spins for dramatic effect. In high heels and tight outfits, no less.
3. What happens first? D.J Khaled chokes on his popcorn? Or he spills it all over the stage, causing some poor aspiring singer to slip mid-performance? The performance will go on, of course. Diddy will shout “greatness,” then cut the singer by the end of the next show.
4. What happens first? One contestant slaps another across the face just before a challenge? Or a contestant takes those “eat, eat, eat” chants seriously and bites into an opponent’s forearm? The judges will frown in disapproval, of course. But they’ll secretly delight in what happened. Disrespect of fellow artists was clearly encouraged in Season 1.
5. Will Meghan Trainor show up in pasties? She was once “All About that Bass,” but Meghan’s neckline dipped lower and lower over the course of Season 1. Like she was trying to divert attention elsewhere. Perhaps away from the empty spot beside her where Charlie Walk once sat.
6. Will anyone watch the second season of this mess? Here’s hoping they don’t, and The Four disappears from the singing show landscape like a bad dream. Or an ill-advised hologram.
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