Idol Chatter & Voice Views

The number of viewers watching American Idol dipped again in 2009.

Oh, Idol is still the most watched show in the land.

But if Idol’s interested in making “it through the pain, weathering the hurricanes, to get to that one thing,” to prove there are no boundaries …

Yuck, still hate that song.

Anyway, Idol, here is my second annual list of 10 tips for saving your show. And I provide them free of charge — provided you do something about tip number 10.

1. Give us a night of original performances, where the finalists sing songs they’ve written. The far inferior Nashville Star finds a way to incorporate an original song night. There’s no reason Idol can’t. How often this year did Idol judges complain that a contestants’ artistry didn’t shine through? What better way for a contestant to show artistry — or lack of it — by singing a song they’ve written? It couldn’t be worse that having a Rat Pack Week.

2. Limit the semifinalists to singers. Comedians need not apply. Look, the amount of camera time wasted on bikini girl Katrina Darrell and drama queen Tatiana Nicole Del Toro was one thing. At least they wanted to sing. But Nick Mitchell, aka Normund Gentle? That was beyond belief. If you have a contestant who isn’t going to sing a serious note though most of the competition, you have a contestant who belongs on another show. Ever hear of “America’s Got Talent”?

3. If you keep the wild card, use it to give us a more diversified field of finalists. This year’s was too heavy on males (8 to 5 females). And how many guys did we really need who wanted to sing the same sort of music, pop wih a twist of soul, or soul with a twist of pop? I counted six. Compare that to last year’s final five — David Cook, David Archuleta, Jason Castro, Syesha and Brooke White. They delivered a breathtaking range of talent. If I judged wild card picks the way I judged songs all season, the judges would get a solid “D.”

4. Fire Kara DioGuardi as a judge. Reason one: She’s incredibly annoying. Reason two: She seemed to champion mediocrity (Matt Giraud, Danny Gokey) over talent in season eight. Reason three: With Kara around, Paula made a point of sounding more coherent and acting more childish (crayons, wrestling matches with Simon) as a ploy to get the most attention of the females at the judges’ table. Her neckline plunged, too.

5. Ditch the four-judge format so we get less talk, more music. I suggested more music last year, too. Instead, what did we get, more judges. The result: Fewer performances from the finalists in the round of five, the round of four and the round of three. Major step in the wrong direction, Idol.

6. Fire Kara as a songwriter, too. “No Boundaries” might be the worst Idol song ever introduced in an Idol finale. Neither finalist could perform it well. And Adam can sing virtually anything. What does that tell you about the song? Quite frankly, I’ve never been a fan of the idea of a pre-chosen Idol single, whether Kara writes it or not. Can you imagine if Blake Lewis won season six and had to record the incredibly ill-suited “This is My Now”?

7. Ending the finale a little late is almost an Idol tradition. But let’s finish all the other shows on time. I mean, when each finalist is singing for just one minute, 30 seconds, it shouldn’t too difficult. Yet one of the season’s greatest performances, Adam’s “Mad World,” was missed by lot of folks who recorded the show because Idol ran so late that week.

8. Not all the changes Idol made this year were bad. For instance, keep the new results show format. Most of those shows featured a performance from a former Idol contestant and a couple of guest stars. The result: There was actually a reason to watch the results show, rather than record it and fast forward to the last five minutes to find out who was eliminated.

9. Keep the judges’ save, too. Look, making a contestant sing for his or her Idol life while the judges debated his or her fate seemed a little cruel. And I didn’t like the fact that the save was used on the clearly unsaveable Matt Giraud. But it sure added a new touch of suspense to the results show.

10. This is the big one, the change that made season eight my least favorite of all Idol seasons — that absolutely ridiculous, unforgiveable mangling of the semifinals. Let me list the reasons …

a) In recent seasons, semifinalists performed each week, with the low vote-getters eliminated. This year, most semifinalists made or didn’t make the finals based on a single 2-minute performance. I have no faith, absolutely none, that the final 13 were anything close to the best 13.

b) The new format gave an unfair advantage to the performers who were profiled earlier in the show and represented a huge disadvantage to those who got little air time. Performers like Lil Rounds and Scott MacIntyre made the finals after disappointing semifinal performances because we had been told they were so good. In truth, the disappointing semifinal performances were a sign of more disappointments to come.

c) Instruments were for some reason banned from the semifinals this year. Why? I have no idea. I mean, the contestants played instruments for their final Hollywood Week songs. Wouldn’t it be just as important to let them play instruments with a spot in the finals on the line?

d) In past years, we actually got to know the performers and develop favorites in the semifinals because we saw them perform week after week. This year, we had heard most of the finalists sing just one live performance before the finals rolled around. Where they really any good? Did they really deserve our support? Who knew?

e) Bottom line: This semifinal format reeked of unfairness and smacked of Idol producers trying to manipulate the finals even beyond the wild card choices. When Kara started babbling about not knowing what it would be like to go shopping with Taylor Vaifanua after the poor girl had gotten to sing for less than 2 minutes … well, that’s just one example of how nauseating the new format was.

The answer, Idol. Go back to the format you used in season seven. After all, it produced one of the most entertaining seasons ever. Compare that to season eight, which ranked among the all-time worst.